


Dear Claire

by grumpyphoenix



Category: Supernatural
Genre: AO3 FB Challenge, Epistolary, F/F, Not Beta Read, Valentine's Day Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-14
Updated: 2018-02-14
Packaged: 2019-03-18 06:19:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,153
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13676010
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/grumpyphoenix/pseuds/grumpyphoenix
Summary: Jody has left a letter for Claire to say goodbye.





	Dear Claire

Claire-

I know leaving you a letter is a coward’s way out, but I know if I tried to say any of this to your face, it would be a disaster. At least this way, I can at least pretend that you weren’t rolling your eyes the whole time. 

I stumbled into hunting the same way everyone does: horrific supernatural interference with my life. For a long time, I understood what drove people like you, Sam and Dean. I was obsessed with keeping what few people I loved that were left  alive, too. You and I know the things that Sam and Dean don’t, though.  See, they were brought up in this life, and so they don’t have our frame of reference. 

We know that we didn’t just lose people, we lost the world. We lost hanging out and watching stupid tv with our family. We lost little league, the prom, dating. We lost feeling safe when we go for a walk in our own home town under the stars in the summer. We lost caring about politics, or what the guy on the news is talking about. It’s like we live on the other side of one way glass; we can see everything over there, but we can’t touch it...and it can’t see us. 

I guess I was okay with that, like I said. I could still touch the other side from time to time. I  _ was _ a Sheriff still. I knew people who didn’t hunt. I lived in a community. I tried to stay grounded. But it wears on you. No one on the other side of that glass wants to come over here, and you wouldn’t wish the knowledge that we have on anyone, so eventually you just end up distancing yourself again.

So… I met Donna during one of those normal life  things that turns into something not normal. I know we have told you that story, but there’s more to it. If you don’t want to know because it’s too weird or you’re pissed, you can just crumple this up and pretend whatever you want, but I’d prefer it if you knew the truth. When we met, I felt like I’d been hit with lightning. She’s gorgeous, Claire, even though she doesn’t want to admit it. She’s beautiful and sweet, and she had this shithead boyfriend. She had a lot of shithead boyfriends, to tell you the truth. Anyway, I just couldn’t stand for the way he treated her, and I made a fool of myself. I was lucky, she decided that maybe I was interesting enough to talk to again, especially after she decapitated her first vampire.

Donna loves it, you know, the hunting. She loves making a difference, and helping people like your sister, but I think what she loves most of all is being a badass. And that’s okay, but she also has a cop’s instinct, so it kind of balances out. I know you love being a badass too, but I think you’re learning to stop thinking with your swagger and start thinking to live. That’s fabulous, and I think you’ll keep your new friends safe like that. I think they’ll keep you safe right back, to be honest. Anyway, Donna.

I kissed her one night after a hunt. I don’t know why -- I have never really been into women before, but she is just so beautiful, Claire. She saved me that night, and we were both so hyper: the hunt had been hard, and I’d almost died. She was cleaning up a really nasty cut, and I just couldn’t help myself. I know it’s bordering on too much, and I’m not going to be mean enough to write something here you’ll need to scrub your eyes out for, but you have to know this -- she freaked the fuck out.

Donna’s conservative. I mean, she grew up in a small town, and hell, she’s a Sheriff like me, which means she lives in the same kind of “middle of no-where” we do. The kiss didn’t go over well, and we tried to patch it up, but it was rocky for a while. Friendship was the key, you know. I would make any excuse to ask her for help on a hunt, and she would just show up out of the blue to take me to lunch, and eventually she just leaned over and kissed me right back.  That was the beginning of the end, for me.

I love her, Claire. We’ve been dancing around each other for years now, but I’ve held back because I was afraid to get too attached to her. I know how that sounds, and I promise you that I wasn’t ever thinking that through to its conclusion. Fear can make you blind and stupid. Sam is actually the one you have to thank for the realization that I was being a dumbass. He told me about a pair of hunters he knew that decided to give it all up and open a ranch, and it was the kind of story that changes your life. I can’t do this anymore. I love you, Alex, and your new sisters, but I’m tapping out now. I want to go and find a life with Donna that doesn’t include hunting. As much. I don’t think she’d let us get too rusty, but I’m not going to devote myself to it. I want to be able to go on the other side of the glass. I want long nights with her, and I want mornings where we do nothing. I want the world back.

Donna likes pancakes and scalding hot coffee. When she has a milkshake, she drinks it too fast and gets a stomach ache. She’s so smart that it’s scary, and it’s even scarier that she can hide it with her homey accent and sweet smile. She still has this warm loving center to her that I can’t see her lose, and oh, Claire, when I kiss her… _ I swear when our lips touch, I can taste the next sixty years of my life _ . For the first time in forever, I want to try to be that old. I want to watch her get that old with me. I want us to babysit your children when you go on a hunt. I’m going to grab this brass ring.

The deed to the house is in the folder under the letter, along with a lot of financial stuff that you should probably just give to Patience. You and Alex will both own the house. Please don’t burn it down. I’m joking, stop frowning. Well, mostly joking. Call Sam and Dean if you need immediate help, and call me if you need me. I’m still here for you, I still love you and want to be in your life. 

  
  


Be safe. Kill monsters. Take care of your growing family. I love you.

  
-Jody.

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt was: I swear when our lips touch, I can taste the next sixty years of my life.
> 
> Not Beta read, written in about an hour at 1am, so if there are glaring errors, all constructive criticism is welcome. Until it isn't.;)


End file.
